"Before you were conceived we wanted you, Before you were born we loved you, Before you were here an hour we would give our life for you. This is the miracle of life. ~Maureen Hawkins"

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Christmas 2010

French Vintage Holiday Card
Click here to browse Shutterfly's holiday card collection.
View the entire collection of cards.

Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Baby Shoes

I saw this on a friends post and it really hit home. 

"Ernest Hemingway was given a challenge: to write a complete story, in under 10 words. Hemingway, known for his brevity, was able to do it in six."

For Sale: Baby shoes, never worn.

Friday, December 3, 2010

Another bust!!!

Well, cycle 1 on 2000 mg Metformin and 50mg Clomid was a bust. Not just a bust, a BIG bust.  Last cycle I was only on 2000 gm Metformin and my progesteron level was at 9.1.  This cycle with the addition of Clomid my progesteron was at 5.1.  I don't understand how my level went DOWN.  So frustrating.  I know we are still at the beginning of our journey and I feel so much for those of you who are so much further in to your journey.  Bless you for all you have indured.  My doctor is uping my Clomid to 100mg for this coming cycle.  Now I just wait for AF to get her so we can get this show on the road :) 

DH and I did take a couple days off this week and headed to the coast for a MUCH needed vacation.  It was so realxing and so nice to just spend time together and not think about TTC or work or life.  We stayed in a two bedroom condo with a jacuzzi tub that my mom scorred for us for $36 a night.  It was amazing :)   A much needed break before we dive into this new cycle. 

Happy Holidays!!

Thursday, November 18, 2010

Holiday Shopping with CSN

Are you looking for some great gift ideas for the holiday season?  Check out my new favorite online store CSN.  They have anything from a counter stool to a new pair of shoes.  I have been checking out all of their web sites and am definitely impressed with their wide varietyelections. I have even found an adorable crib at an amazing price.  Someday, when we finally are in need of one, I know where to find it :)  Until then I will definitely be shopping some of their other amazing items.

The exciting part....for an upcoming review, CSN stores are going to let me pick something to review!!  I am also working with them on coordinating my very first GIVEAWAY!!  So check them out and stay tuned :)


Wednesday, November 17, 2010

i HEART Shutterfly!!

Why do I heart Shutterfly you may ask.  Well, possibly because being on Clomid has made be an emotion wreck :)  However, it is more likely that I heart them because they are amazing.  I have created and ordrered hard bound books, cards and photo prints from them in the past and have been 100% satisfied with their product every time.  Why am I raving about Shutterfly you may ask.  Well, because not only do I love the products they have to offer but also because they have bloggers an opportunity to recieve 50 free holiday cards.  It's that amazing.  I think so.  I was of course already planning on buying my holiday cards from Shutterfly but now....they are free :)  Which means I can use the money I was going to spend to buy something else off of their site :)  Hmmmm  what should I create, a new photo book?  We shall see, we shall see.

Here are a few of my favorites from this year.

Faith Hope Love Religious 5x7 photo card

Modern Ornaments Christmas card 4x6

Peppermint Swirls Christmas 4x6

There are so many to chose from I'm going to have a hard time choosing just one.

Bloggers Get 50 FREE Cards Here

In the mean time check out some of their awesome products:
Holiday Cards: Here
Photo Christmas Cards:Here
Calendars: Here
Other fabulous products:Here


Sunday, November 14, 2010

Let the fun begin....

I am officially at the end of day two of my first five day round of Clomid 50mg + Metformin 2000mg daily.  I have not experienced any side effects...... YET.  I am thinking this is either a good thing ( meaning I will get through this round with no side effects and end up with a BFP at the end of this cycle ) or, this is a bad thing (meaning my body is not responding to the medication which means no ovulation and on to the next step).  I am really hoping for the first option.  I know the likely hood that we would get pregnant on our first round is extremely low but a girl can hope :)  In the least I am crossing my fingers that we find the medication is making me ovulate which would put us one step closer to the BFP we are so patiently hoping for. 

In other news, I have spent this past weekend with my amazing parents watching my little sister play in the 1A State Volleyball tournament (she's not my sister by blood but my mom basically raised her and her little sister from birth, watching them 10 hrs a day 5-6 days a week, so they feel like my real sisters and I love them just the same). Our team ended up coming in 4th.  Not to shabby if I do say so myself :)  Very proud of them.  Go Lady Rockets!!!! 


Thursday, November 4, 2010

I knew there was a reason I loved my new Dr.

Well, I just got a message from my doctor and she has decided we will not be waiting around to see if Metformin helps me ovulate and we are moving right on to starting on Clomid!!!  I am so much happier with this new doctor and her very proactive aggressive approach to us getting pregnant.  She seems just as excited for us to get pregnant as we are :)  Soooo, just waiting to hear back from her on what the full plan is and excited now for AF to show up so we can start our next cycle and get this show on the road :) 

Wednesday, November 3, 2010

Hold me close, don't ever let me go....

Well, it looks like our good news train has come to a screeching halt.........................

  I received the results of my Day 21 Progesterone test this morning and my level was at 9.1 :(  I'm not really sure what a good level is since while searching the internet I have gotten an answer of anywhere between 18 and 80 but my doctor said in her notes that this low level signals that we did not ovulate this cycle.  What does this mean?  It means I have beatiful eggs and LOTS of them but my body doesn't want to share them with Mr. sperm.  We are continuing on Metformin for two to three more cycles to see if I ovulate at all.  If not it's on to Clomid.  I'm a little leary of starting on Clomid.  My dad is a twin and my husband has twins on his side of the family.  Not that I wouldn't be so excited to have two little miracles to love I just worry about all the health issues that go along with multiple births. 

Well, enough depressing news for today.  I hope everyone has a lovely Wednesday.

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

Halloween Goodies

Halloween turned out to be a great day and I got to see so many adorable little gobblins and gouhls.  Below are some pictures from the day.

My Nephew (Charzar from Pokemon) and Niece (Little Devil)
 My mom makes their costumes every year :)

Of course you all know my adorable little nephew.  Doesn't he make the cuttest little teddy bear :)

    My favorite little duckie (It took her mom and dad 10 years, 6 mnths of medicaly induced menopause and three rounds of IVF to get her. Plus she was the last of two eggs.  If she didn't stick they were out of luck. Talk about a little miracle!!!)

               Wonder Woman and her Ducky sidekick                                         Tootsie Roll :)


The door way into my teams Halloween area (Western Saloon)

Inside the saloon

in side the saloon

My two (big) bosses

Monsters Inc.

more Monsters Inc.

The game of LIFE

LIFE wheel

Enterance to building


Dora the Explorer

Souther Bell

Thursday, October 28, 2010

That time of year again

Well, it's that time of year again, the time of year that I love. The fall leaves are all changing into brilliant colors or red, orange, yellow and green. The air seems to be so much crisper than the rest of the year. All I want to do is curl up in my DH's arms by a fire place and sip hot chocolate with teeny tiny marshmallows.

It's also the time of year that I dread. The people around me are all talking about what their children are going to be for Halloween and my work is abuzz with Halloween planning. If I have not posted it before, Halloween is a BIG deal at my work. Every "Team" is given $500 and has to come up with a theme and then is given designated areas of the building to decorate with that theme. We make it kid friendly and after 4 p.m. all the parents bring in their kids to trick or treat the office. I think it's a great thing and a nice place for the parents to take their children that is warm and safe. My office has close to 500 employees of which about 80% have children so you can imagine the flood of kiddies that come my way at 4 p.m. I cherish this day and being able to see all my co-worker friends in their adorable little costumes.

I however, can't help but be saddened at the same time that every year on Halloween I am reminded of what DH and I were blessed with for such a short time and that was ripped from our grasp on this day, October 31st, two years ago. My heart breaks for our angel babies and I often wonder if that will be my only experience of motherhood. Will I never get the joy of being pregnant again? Will we never get to hold our own dear baby in our arms? I do pretty well throughout the year holding back my emotions but that big, ugly green monster seems to rear his ugly head this time each year. Maybe he thinks this is a good time of year to come out seeing how everyone else is dressed up in monsters costumes or maybe it's just the emotion of it all flooding back. Whatever the case may be I am ready to create some happy memories to associate with this day. I know we will never forget our angel babies but hope that someday the pain will lessen and be replaced with the joy of a little one who can help fill a little bit of that hole in our hearts.

Sorry for the rambling. I hope everyone has an amazing Halloween and can't wait to see all the adorable costumes this year. Enjoy the beautiful fall weather and hug your babies tight as they are all true miracles no matter how they were brought into your life.

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

We hit a MINI jackpot......sort of.


Unfortunately, we didn't win big in Vegas but we had a great time hangin out with family and taking in all that Vegas has to offer.  We ate some delicious food, expecially the seafood buffet at the RIO.  Highly recommended if you love seafood.   We didn't win big at the Rio but it was still worth it for the food and free entertainment.  I did win a little while we were there though.  When we first arrived I sat down next to my MIL and put some money in a machine next to the one she was playing and on about the third spin the machine froze up on me.  I still had $15.90 in the machine so I couldn't just walk away.  As I sat and waited and waited for someone to come fix my machine and retrieve my money the rest of our party (there were about 15 of us), was seated for dinner.  My DH was nice enough to wait with me while I was stuck out in the casino at my stupid broken machine.  The first guy who came over to fix the machine was unable to figure outthe problem so he had to call in a second guy who FINALLY got it fixed.  By that time I had been waiting at the machine for about half an hour and was getting extremely irritated.  By the time I was finished they would all be done with dinner.  Well, to my suprise, the second guy finally got the machine to work and it picked up where it had left of and the machine went into a spinning frenzy and sent me to the bonus and then retriggered the bonus and I ended up walking away with $111.00.  I thought that was pretty good payout for my troubles :)  LOL 

On the MINI jackpot front.  DH and I went in for some testing before we left on vacation, DH for an SA and me for a 3 day FSH and Estrodile.  We got an email from the clinic while on vacation and it was GREAT news.  I am so happy that we are starting off this time with better news than last time.  DH's SA came back perfect which was a huge relief as the first time about two years ago they were a little unhappy with his results.  My FSH came back at a 4 which they say is pretty great.  They usually like to see it below a 9 and the lower the better.  Which means I have a good egg reserve.  My Estrodile came back at a 40 which is great as well.  They usually like to see it at or below 80 and the lower the better.  This is supposed to signal that the quality of my eggs is good as well.  So, yay for that great news.  Now we just need to figure out why with such great starting results it is so hard for us to GET pregnant and when we do get pregnant why it's so hard for us to STAY pregnant.  Hoping this news is a signal for how the rest of this attemp is going to go and hopefully in a few months we are reporting a BFP and a few months after that the birth of a healthy little miracle. 

Happy Wednesday Everyone!!!

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Viva Las Vegas!!!! and CD1

I'm so excited, DH and I are heading to Vegas tomorrow.  We are definitely ready for a vacation.  With him being on straight graveyards and me being sick all last week it's time for a little R&R and time together.  We are going with a whole group of people so it should be a blast.  We are staying at the Harrah's this time which is new for us.  We usually stay down on Freemont street.  I'm sure we will still make it down there to contribute a bit of money at some point :)   Last time we went I won $1200 at the Golden Nugget so here's hoping this trip is as succesful. 

On the TTC side of things I had my first CD1 on Metformin yesterday which is a great sign that it is working and hopefully we will be seeing a BFP soon.  I was hoping to bring home a little jackpot from Vegas but the timing just didn't work out right.  Oh well,  I'm not to concerened WHERE it happens, just THAT it happens.  :) 

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Metformin and good news


The Metformin is reacting to my body COMPLETELY different than the last two times and I am not enjoying the side effects.  I will however endure them and more if it means eventually getting our little miracle.  It would be so much easier if I didn't have to work full time but le sigh, that is the way of the world.  I do have an amazing boss and an amazing job though so I can't complain.  I think my boss is more excited for us to get pregnant than we are.  Well, not quite but you get the point :) 

On a happier note, hubby and I are taking of for a much needed vacation to Las Vegas in 8 days and.....................I just found out that I have been shorted two weeks of vacation.  Now I just need to figure out what I'm going to do with all my new found PTO (Paid Time OFF).  I'm thinking of taking hubby to Mexico early next year.  Maybe bring home a little souvenier if we aren't already pregnant :) 

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

On the road again......

* If you are close friends or family we ask that you please not share this information as we have decided to wait to see how things go before we tell anyone we are trying or hopefully that we are expecting.


It's official. We are TRYING again. I have been working with a dietician to try to get some weight off and that has been going pretty well as of late. So, hubby and I decided it was time to get back on that horse and start trying again. I can't say I'm not completely nervous since our last two attempts have not ended so well but I just know that we are meant to be parents and am not ready to give up trying.

I met with my doctor on Friday and am comfortable with the plan we have in place. I took by last BCP on Sep 5th and started on my first month of Metformin Sept 24th. We are going to try the Metformin (which I was on for three months the first time we got pregnant) for 3-4 months. During that time I will be doing 3 day and 21 day progesterone testing to see if I am ovulating. Since I have PCOS and Hypothyroid disease it is not known whether I ovulate when not on birth control as I can go anywhere from 3 to 6 months without a visit from you know who. Then if we aren't pregnant after those 3-4 months she will be starting us on Clomid. I hope, hope, hope the Metformin works. It's been 5 years since we first started trying and I am sooooo ready to me a mommy.

On a side note, look how adorable my nephew is :)


Friday, August 20, 2010


Well, the diet hasn't been going so great lately.  Gained back 8lbs :(  Oh well, we are going to my SIL and BIL's house this weekend for a BBQ and it should be a great time with good food, good friend, great family, and lots of babies. Plus, my hubby has the weekend off after 14 days of straight graveyards.   What could be better ;)  Then Sunday we are supposed to be going to the horse races.  This will be my first time at the races and I'm super exctied. It shoudl be a good time.  I'll post some pictures next week. 

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Welcome back old friend

Well, it's been a while since my last post.  Hubby and I got rid of our internet connection at home so I only hav access through my work computer.  Let's see, what has happened since I last checked in:

1) I spent a glorious 4 days in NY with my mom and sister.  I am officially in love with the city and can not wait to go back again.

My mom (on the left) and I waiting for the Subway
My sis (on the left), mom and I at Battery Park getting ready to see the Statue of Liberty

Sis, Me and Mom drinking our Ozmopolitans at intermision of Wicked.  The best play ever!!
2) I gouged my leg open on a picnic table
3) Two day's later I broke my pinkie toe on my suitcase while unpacking from an amazing weekending with DH.  Am now sporting an adorable purple pinkie toe with my freshly pedicured toes ;)

In other news, the diet is going pretty well.  I took a few weeks off for NY and a couple other mini vacation but am back on track.  Down 36lbs in 13 weeks and going strong.  Still hoping to meet my goal by December so we can start trying for our little miracle. 

Speaking of little miracles, I woudl like to say congratulations to my cousin who just found out today that she is getting her new baby daughter.  The papers are being signed and she and her DH are officially going to be parents to an adorable little 6 week old baby girl.  Sophia Roselynn welcome to the family. 

Friday, May 14, 2010

Friday Weight Day

Week four weigh in this morning.  Down 20 lbs :)  Went for a walk with my mom last nigth and for the first time since I can't remember when, my back wasn't killing me :)  I am going to be ready for NY in June in no time ;)  Power shopping with my sister, here we come!!!

On a side note, the DH and I are going up to see our new nephew this weekend.  I am sooooooo excited to actually be able to get to see him and hold him and soak up all his baby goodness :)  I will post some pictures of the little glow worm when we get back :)

Happy Friday!!

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Friday Weigh Day, A Baby and Food Poisoning!

I would like to start off by saying Happy Mothers day to all the mothers and mother's to be out there.  I can not wait till the day I can join the club :)  I hope you all have an amazing day and are spoiled and appreciated for all you hard work.

This is a couple days late but here is the weight loss update.  I ended up having to weigh on Thursday as I got an email in the morning that my SIL's water had broken.  I wasn't sure if I would be able to weigh on Friday so I weighed Thursday instead.  Down 2 more lbs for a total of 16 so far. 

Speaking of my SIL's water breaking..... I am officially a new auntie.  Parker David entered the world around 5:02 a.m. on 5/7/2010 weighing in @ a healthy 7lbs 12oz and 21in long.  This was a great day to be born as it also happens to be his parternal granfathers birthday.  This is their first grandbaby so it is extra special.  My SIL was a trooper.  Her water broke at 6:30 p.m. on Wednesday evening which means she was in labor for 34 1/2 hours!!  Holy Cow!! 

                                     Here is a picture of the little guy, he looks alot like his daddy.

The hubby and I are planning on going up next weekend to see him since my hubby didn't get to be there when he was born.  I can't wait to finally get to hold him and see how much he's changed since he was born. 

Congratulations to my BIL and SIL!!!

How does the food poisoning come in to play you ask? Well, I arrived at work Thursday morning to an email from my SIL's sister letting me know my SIL's water had broken the night before.  I was so excited I could barely think straight :) So I had a meeting that morning but the rest of my day was free.  I called my in-laws to see what their plans were as far as making the 2 1/2 hour drive to the hospital and they weren't planning on taking off for a couple of hours.  Since I have the best boss in the world I was able to go to my morning meeting and then leave for the day early enough to meet up with my in-laws and make the trip north to the hospital.  We arrived at around 1:00 in the afternoon and my SIL was still dressed but hooked up the the fetal monitors and able to talk through her contractions which meant the baby wasn't coming anytime soon.  So the in-laws and I decided to go get some lunch (since we had forgotten to eat with all the excitement) while we were waiting.  We went to a cute little brewery in town and I ordered Grilled Salmon and a garden salad.  About half way through my salmon I noticed that the entire inside was completely raw!  We said something to the waiter and I was given a new lunch with a FULLY cooked piece of salmon but the damage had already been done.  Soooo after no sleep in 29 hours (totally worth it to meet little Parker) and a lunch of raw fish I have spent the weekend with a very sower tummy :(  Luckely I am starting to feel much better just in time to celebrate Mothers Day with my family :)  Happy Mothers Day to all who are blessed with little miracles and little miracles too be and for those of us who are still waiting to be blessed with little miracles.


Friday, April 30, 2010

Friday Weigh Day!

Today is start of week three and Weigh day for end of week two. I am down 3.8 for the week and 14lbs so far overall.  I hope this keeps up and I can stick with this.  I just know it is going to help our TTC efforts in the long run.

Happy Friday to all my Bloggies!!!

Thursday, April 29, 2010

If you do nothing else today, watch this video!!!

I came across this video that Kate over at Busted Plumbing Here posted today and like she said, it shook me to the core. We too have been struggling with infertility for five years and know how incredibly hard it is to explain to anyone how it feels if they haven't gone through it themselves.

You may have heard about Project IF, if not check it out at The Stirrup Queen's Project IF Here. This is Keiko's submission for Project IF, and it is amazing. Her video does an exceptional job of turning our words into live action and the impact is HUGE.  Thank you Keiko for bringing our words to life.


Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Baby Diet

I have offically started by Baby Diet journey.  It began on April 19th and so far I am down 13.2 lbs.  Let's hope this keeps up and I am to a healthy pre-baby weight in no time :)